it's new years again. hasn't the whole new years thing worn off a bit? it's not as good as christmas and all you get to do is get drunk and embarass yourself. don't get me wrong, usually i love doing those things, and i'm hella good at them, but i don't like doing them in the false name of an event. if i want to puke in the street and shout at a dog, i'm not going to pretend it's 'because it's the new year'. no. i just want to do it because it's fun. but hey, if the reason other people are doing it is new year then i'm going to join in. still won't say happy new year though.
that said, it's just going to be a large one tonight at the heaton hall massiv! i'm just going to refuse to say happy new years as usual and continue to do as i please in the name of ' i am hammered'.
and to follow this lovely sentiment....
WORD TO YOUR MOMS I CAME TO DROP BOMBS, I GOT MORE RHYMES THAN THE BIBLE GOT PSALMS
wooooooooo
Friday 31 December 2010
Tuesday 28 December 2010
apparently
i have some strange standards when it comes to food. i had not previously been aware of this, except obviously for all the jokes my family make about how much i eat. which they do, and they all take great joy in. luckily i am a confident person, and am not convinced that a healthy appetite makes me greedy etc. so i take it in my stride. either way, i hadn't realised that apparently my habits to do with food are odd, but upon actually revising them i've realised that i'm basically the rainman of food. here are three examples: judge for yourselves.
1. if a meal with a boiled egg is being eaten, the egg is to be saved until last. if in a sauce based dish, a small portion of sauce must be saved with which to eat the special saved egg.
2. small sweets (celebrations, ferrero roche etc.) must be eaten in either twos or fives depending on what you fancy. if two, your second favourite one comes first, then your favourite. if five, your favourite, your second favourite, your third favourite, your second favourite and then your favourite again.
3. cooked meals of things like meat and vegs have to be eaten in turns. mouthful of meat, then veg, then meat with veg, then a sip of drink and repeat.
am i obviously autistic? or just neat? i don't know. but i've just had my fifth celebration, and it's time to stop.
UR
it was christmas, and now it isn't. hurrah! i've been shunning social interaction by convincing myself that i have a cold (i don't) and staying inside eating cheese and playing fallout new vegas.
which is terrible.
forgive me the nerd spiel, i know no-one likes an amateur game review. but new vegas is really really awful. i'm level nine after ten hours work, and i am still getting killed by giant gold geckos (?)
gah.
now i'm watching the gilmore girls and i'm about to have a lush bathbomb bath. steve kindly got me a bathbomb set for chrimbo, after i gave him a copy of the walking dead that his wife had already given him, so a failure on my part, and i feel like a bathbomb bath would be nice for my imaginary illness.
i'm going to post an excellent photo of me and my knitted green dragon if i can figure out how.
which is terrible.
forgive me the nerd spiel, i know no-one likes an amateur game review. but new vegas is really really awful. i'm level nine after ten hours work, and i am still getting killed by giant gold geckos (?)
gah.
now i'm watching the gilmore girls and i'm about to have a lush bathbomb bath. steve kindly got me a bathbomb set for chrimbo, after i gave him a copy of the walking dead that his wife had already given him, so a failure on my part, and i feel like a bathbomb bath would be nice for my imaginary illness.
i'm going to post an excellent photo of me and my knitted green dragon if i can figure out how.
Tuesday 21 December 2010
enjoy defaced posters?
david cameron has more defaced posters than anyone ever
enjoy them here:
http://www.moneymad.org/David_Cameron_defaced_posters.htm
enjoy them here:
http://www.moneymad.org/David_Cameron_defaced_posters.htm
Thursday 9 December 2010
it's a very dark day
liberal democrats let us all down. we expected it of the tories, but i actually expected better from lib dems. i'm sad to say i expected too much. education is no longer a right, but a privilege. student fees have tripled. the end is nigh. ANARRRRCCCHHHHYYYYYYYYYYY
or something, i don't know, i didn't protest. i don't really care about anything enough to protest on its behalf. except my mum, but i don't think anyone's going to outlaw her any day soon.
anyway
Monday 6 December 2010
SOME STUPID CONCEPTS
advertising and campaigning are getting to be even stupider than the people they're aiming to catch. here are my thoughts.
the 'it gets better' videos? oh wow, how great! celebrities are teaming up to make videos encouraging gay youths not to kill themselves because when you're not a gay teenager, you're a gay adult. how sweet. weirdly enough though, i haven't seen any saying ' don't worry, by the time you're too old to get bullied in school, you'll be an adult unable to serve in your own military force, get married, or adopt! it gets better!' well done america, really covered yourself there. i'll be fair though, 'it gets worse' isn't really a catchy slogan.
also on the american side is the silence campaign where celebrities are deleting their twitter accounts for charity or some shit. i can't somehow imagine the idea that deleting your twitter account could ever benefit anyone ever. that's the best effort you can make? why not just give some money you tight bastards, you're all loaded! and usher's broken his stupid promise before the campaign's even over. he's risking a serious amount of chris brown treatment from people.
but the worst one of all: changing your facebook profile picture to one of your favourite childhood cartoon character to protest against child abuse.
what
the
fuck.
i mean, seriously. what the actual fuck. does anyone actually think it'll make an iota of difference what their profile picture is of? do they actually hold such massive importance to facebook that they think it'll stop child abuse? do people think that rapey uncle roger will log on to facebook, see a picture of scooby doo and think 'you know, enough is enough. i'm done with raping children!' no. that's not going to happen. it doesn't even occur to people to DONATE MONEY. which might actually make a speck of difference. instead they call attention to a cause, and then do nothing about it. they should actually feel guilty for 'caring' enough to change their profile picture and then do fuck all valuable about something they obviously feel 'so seriously' about. boy is my face red for putting my opinion on facebook though, since it's been received so well. you'd think i was actually advocating child abuse rather than commenting on the complete stupidity of the whole idea. it's just another fake way for people to pretend they have principles but then make no effort to change anything.
i hate people sometimes.
the 'it gets better' videos? oh wow, how great! celebrities are teaming up to make videos encouraging gay youths not to kill themselves because when you're not a gay teenager, you're a gay adult. how sweet. weirdly enough though, i haven't seen any saying ' don't worry, by the time you're too old to get bullied in school, you'll be an adult unable to serve in your own military force, get married, or adopt! it gets better!' well done america, really covered yourself there. i'll be fair though, 'it gets worse' isn't really a catchy slogan.
also on the american side is the silence campaign where celebrities are deleting their twitter accounts for charity or some shit. i can't somehow imagine the idea that deleting your twitter account could ever benefit anyone ever. that's the best effort you can make? why not just give some money you tight bastards, you're all loaded! and usher's broken his stupid promise before the campaign's even over. he's risking a serious amount of chris brown treatment from people.
but the worst one of all: changing your facebook profile picture to one of your favourite childhood cartoon character to protest against child abuse.
what
the
fuck.
i mean, seriously. what the actual fuck. does anyone actually think it'll make an iota of difference what their profile picture is of? do they actually hold such massive importance to facebook that they think it'll stop child abuse? do people think that rapey uncle roger will log on to facebook, see a picture of scooby doo and think 'you know, enough is enough. i'm done with raping children!' no. that's not going to happen. it doesn't even occur to people to DONATE MONEY. which might actually make a speck of difference. instead they call attention to a cause, and then do nothing about it. they should actually feel guilty for 'caring' enough to change their profile picture and then do fuck all valuable about something they obviously feel 'so seriously' about. boy is my face red for putting my opinion on facebook though, since it's been received so well. you'd think i was actually advocating child abuse rather than commenting on the complete stupidity of the whole idea. it's just another fake way for people to pretend they have principles but then make no effort to change anything.
i hate people sometimes.
Friday 3 December 2010
hazy days
do you ever get the feeling that your head is full of cotton wool? i do. 'spacey' is the kind way people usually describe my tendencies to gaze glassy-eyed at walls and then sniff, blink and say 'sorry, what?' but in actual fact i am fairly sure i am in contact with worlds beyond our own...
haha, got you.
no, i just don't pay attention most of the time. but maybe it's the copious quantities of snow in newcastle settling on my brain and fuzzing me out more than usual. it's so snowy here, and yes i know, english people think that an inch of snow is terrifying, but we're talking serious serious up to the knees blizzards. this never, ever happens, so i am completely flabberghasted about snow couture. i've been wearing primark wellies, a tatty old fur coat and a giant wooden handled old lady umbrella so i look like rupert the bear sporting a neon pink coiffure. i'm sure it's sexy. i have no idea how to face snow though. just walking to university is like a freezing wet assault course. i half expect a drill sergeant to start pushing me over and screaming IS THAT THE BEST YOU CAN DO? because what with not being the most gifted with co-ordination, i have been falling over more than is my usual precedent. no, i've opted for indoor relaxation; brideshead revisited, blankets, velour tracksuit (guilty pleasure), and earl grey tea. the only reason i'd leave the house is for some kind of serious reason, which there isn't as of yet, so hurrah!
THINGS I HATE MOST ABOUT THE SNOW
1. slush. snow is very pretty when you're inside and warm and it's picturesque, but the problem is that snow has to be walked on. and when snow is walked on, it turns into grey freezing slippery goo. which is neither picturesque nor practical. then people throw salt in it, as if that does anything other than make it slippery and gritty. i saw a woman throwing saxo on her doorstep this morning and i just wanted to scream IT'S NOT GOING TO WORK at her.
2. snowballs. i have always deeply, deeply loathed snowballs. the idea that at any second a wet icy thing could hit me makes me walk like a suspicious vulture. combine the vulture hunching with my robust high knee strides, and you've got one stupid looking person. all the children in jesmond seem to smell my fear, like cruel dogs in school uniform, and they instantly pelt me. i haven't cried yet, just turned around and tried to look stern, but i'm sure they'll crack me soon.
3. having to wear lots of layers. not that i am exactly having to forsake daisy dukes and crop tops, but wearing a tee-shirt, shirt, jumper, hoody and coat is excessive even for me. it looks like i've gained about four stone every time i get dressed.
4. how cold my house is. i rent an attic in a student area, so naturally the walls are made of paper and spit. the windows are plastic. it is so cold in here that i have to sleep in my dressing gown. in fact, i have a special system of sleeping just so that i don't get hypothermia during the night and die. i put on tights and a tee-shirt, then pyjamas, then dressing gown. then i make a pouch of blanket for my feet, and another blanket is worn on the head like a turban, then i get in and shiver my way to sleep. it's horrific.
5. the fact that getting up is even harder. as if i didn't already have long discussions with myself in the mornings about whether i should bother getting up or not, i have to genuinely force myself to leave the house at all. i've hardly been to uni this week, but i've gone to work because i need the money so i can buy blankets and cocoa.
6. having showers is now horrible. the idea of actually being naked makes me shudder now, because i am too cold to do it. getting in the shower is enough of a gamble anyway, what with the delightful tendency it has to boil/freeze you, but now it's impossible. i probably smell, but i don't care, i can't smell myself so it's not my problem.
i think i've vented most of my snow-based rage. that and my heater is cheering me up with warms.
haha, got you.
no, i just don't pay attention most of the time. but maybe it's the copious quantities of snow in newcastle settling on my brain and fuzzing me out more than usual. it's so snowy here, and yes i know, english people think that an inch of snow is terrifying, but we're talking serious serious up to the knees blizzards. this never, ever happens, so i am completely flabberghasted about snow couture. i've been wearing primark wellies, a tatty old fur coat and a giant wooden handled old lady umbrella so i look like rupert the bear sporting a neon pink coiffure. i'm sure it's sexy. i have no idea how to face snow though. just walking to university is like a freezing wet assault course. i half expect a drill sergeant to start pushing me over and screaming IS THAT THE BEST YOU CAN DO? because what with not being the most gifted with co-ordination, i have been falling over more than is my usual precedent. no, i've opted for indoor relaxation; brideshead revisited, blankets, velour tracksuit (guilty pleasure), and earl grey tea. the only reason i'd leave the house is for some kind of serious reason, which there isn't as of yet, so hurrah!
THINGS I HATE MOST ABOUT THE SNOW
1. slush. snow is very pretty when you're inside and warm and it's picturesque, but the problem is that snow has to be walked on. and when snow is walked on, it turns into grey freezing slippery goo. which is neither picturesque nor practical. then people throw salt in it, as if that does anything other than make it slippery and gritty. i saw a woman throwing saxo on her doorstep this morning and i just wanted to scream IT'S NOT GOING TO WORK at her.
2. snowballs. i have always deeply, deeply loathed snowballs. the idea that at any second a wet icy thing could hit me makes me walk like a suspicious vulture. combine the vulture hunching with my robust high knee strides, and you've got one stupid looking person. all the children in jesmond seem to smell my fear, like cruel dogs in school uniform, and they instantly pelt me. i haven't cried yet, just turned around and tried to look stern, but i'm sure they'll crack me soon.
3. having to wear lots of layers. not that i am exactly having to forsake daisy dukes and crop tops, but wearing a tee-shirt, shirt, jumper, hoody and coat is excessive even for me. it looks like i've gained about four stone every time i get dressed.
4. how cold my house is. i rent an attic in a student area, so naturally the walls are made of paper and spit. the windows are plastic. it is so cold in here that i have to sleep in my dressing gown. in fact, i have a special system of sleeping just so that i don't get hypothermia during the night and die. i put on tights and a tee-shirt, then pyjamas, then dressing gown. then i make a pouch of blanket for my feet, and another blanket is worn on the head like a turban, then i get in and shiver my way to sleep. it's horrific.
5. the fact that getting up is even harder. as if i didn't already have long discussions with myself in the mornings about whether i should bother getting up or not, i have to genuinely force myself to leave the house at all. i've hardly been to uni this week, but i've gone to work because i need the money so i can buy blankets and cocoa.
6. having showers is now horrible. the idea of actually being naked makes me shudder now, because i am too cold to do it. getting in the shower is enough of a gamble anyway, what with the delightful tendency it has to boil/freeze you, but now it's impossible. i probably smell, but i don't care, i can't smell myself so it's not my problem.
i think i've vented most of my snow-based rage. that and my heater is cheering me up with warms.
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