Sunday 30 May 2010
Friday 28 May 2010
mmmm
i have new bed covers. they are so nice and soft and warm, and they are facilitating my lazy day because i'm in bed at one in the afternoon listening to happy tunes. i should probably get a cup of coffee to complete the loveliness but joe is passed out on the living room floor with a bucket of sick next to him and i don't want to step on him. he might vom on me. ahhhhhh i love being not hungover when other people are.
Tuesday 25 May 2010
it's that time again
things that annoy me vol. 278722
+ people who have to mention things. they can't just say they're sitting around listening to music, they have to mention which music and you can completely tell they think they're awesome. or they've just watched tv, and they have to mention that it's some hipster indie tv show. as if anybody has actually asked them. they are just looking for recognition and cool points. sick. whatever, i can't stop people doing it, but i can request that when you're listening to the smiths and cutting yourself for attention try not to post any pictures on the internet while you're doing it. -note- i fully realise that i mention bands i like now though, so i guess i'm just as much of a tosser as everyone else.
+ when people think i am bitter and cynical for comical effect, or to have an image. i don't. i am not always angry, sometimes i'm pretty nice. i just resent people being very concerned with how they come across to other people. you can always tell when people are acting like they're on fucking tv when they're talking to you. or telling you stupid show-offy things. i like people who are largely unfussed by what they look like, or how they're coming across, it's nice.
+ people using books to be cool is especially awful. books are sacred and should never, ever be used for evil. referencing books to be cool is tantamount to child murder. i'm sorry. books aren't cool. they just aren't. carrying around a vintage copy of oscar wilde automatically lets me know that you're not actually a reader, you're wrongly convinced that reading is cool. a girl in my sixth form used to try and talk to me about old books because she said i was 'one of the only people who really liked english literature'. to which i said WOAH WOAH WOAH do not lump me in your elitist club ( and subsequently made her cry, my bad). i read books yes, but for fun, not to get cool points. that is not right and there should be a RSPCA equivalent to fight against it. she didn't understand. quoting passages of the great gatsby is nice, if you mean it, but i must re-iterate... if you actually like to read. i mean, i like all sorts of books, not just vaguely respectable ones. i like trashy awful books you get free with sunday papers, i like books written for dramatic teenage girls and horny teenage boys, but i just like to read. if i'm in the bath i will just read bottles for something to do. it's a nice way to occupy yourself, and i can't occupy myself very well, so reading is perfect for me because it's immersive and satisfying.
+ rah girls hair. rah girls are obviously an english thing, and i'm not even sure which bits of england they're indigenous to. but rah girls are terribly english girls who go to university in ugg boots, pyjama bottoms, sports gilets and backcombed chinese widow buns falling off their heads. the way they talk sounds like RAH RAH RAH RAH, explaining the name. (for further reference http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=rah) but either way, of all the things i hate about them (there are many) their hair is near the top of the list. you can tell it's long, well-conditioned, regularly cut and highlighted perfect celebrity type hair, so why do they insist on combing it backwards until it's ginormous and tangly, and then turning it into huge birds nests on their heads? i think they think it gives them an air of 'i don't give a fuck' and makes them rock chicks or whatever, but it doesn't. it's a flashing beacon to anyone who isn't a rah that they are idiots.
+ the fact that everything has a sequel. can't some films be allowed to go to the grave having only been a singular release? ghostbusters 3 for fucks sakes. what is that.
+ the human centipede. URRGH URGH URGH. ever since i heard about that, i have genuinely not felt right. i've had nightmares, it pops into my head randomly and then i tear up and have to stare at the wall, it stops me eating malt loaf. that's how associative my memory is, i can't eat malt load anymore because of that film. it's absolutely rank, and horror films don't usually gross me out, but literally this even puts me off food, and nothing puts me off food. i once ate custard while someone vomited next to me with absolutely no qualms. so well done in a way, since i haven't even seen the fucker and it's ruined my appetite.
+ how quickly hair dye fades. half my hair is still pink, and the roots are kid of pale ginger-pink, it looks weird! not that it bothers me enough to do anything about it, i just occasionally catch sight of myself in a mirror and think 'hm'.
+ the current weird weather in newcastle. it's kind of like the frequent stormy periods in my parents house; you don't know what's happening, why, or when it's going to can it. suddenly boiling hot, then cloudy, then raining? make your mind up sky, because i can't do it for you.
+ people like me who complain a lot. not in a self-loathing way, i just assume it's really boring for everyone else.
things i like vol. 1
+ zero punctuation. it's hilarious.
+ food in bed. it's delicious. and warm.
+ my jumper
+ posting cruel questions on peoples formsprings. serves them right for having formspring, what a retarded idea. i had one for like a week, thinking this'll be fun! then i realised how insanely vain it made me, and i felt like a douche and deleted it. i see the appeal admittedly, but i also have self-esteem. you can see the dilemma.
+ strawberry yoghurt in the bath. not in the bath itself, me eating strawberry yoghurt when i'm in the bath. mmmm.
+ jemina pearl. you beaut.
this has been very satisfying. strawberry yoghurt in the bath time!
+ people who have to mention things. they can't just say they're sitting around listening to music, they have to mention which music and you can completely tell they think they're awesome. or they've just watched tv, and they have to mention that it's some hipster indie tv show. as if anybody has actually asked them. they are just looking for recognition and cool points. sick. whatever, i can't stop people doing it, but i can request that when you're listening to the smiths and cutting yourself for attention try not to post any pictures on the internet while you're doing it. -note- i fully realise that i mention bands i like now though, so i guess i'm just as much of a tosser as everyone else.
+ when people think i am bitter and cynical for comical effect, or to have an image. i don't. i am not always angry, sometimes i'm pretty nice. i just resent people being very concerned with how they come across to other people. you can always tell when people are acting like they're on fucking tv when they're talking to you. or telling you stupid show-offy things. i like people who are largely unfussed by what they look like, or how they're coming across, it's nice.
+ people using books to be cool is especially awful. books are sacred and should never, ever be used for evil. referencing books to be cool is tantamount to child murder. i'm sorry. books aren't cool. they just aren't. carrying around a vintage copy of oscar wilde automatically lets me know that you're not actually a reader, you're wrongly convinced that reading is cool. a girl in my sixth form used to try and talk to me about old books because she said i was 'one of the only people who really liked english literature'. to which i said WOAH WOAH WOAH do not lump me in your elitist club ( and subsequently made her cry, my bad). i read books yes, but for fun, not to get cool points. that is not right and there should be a RSPCA equivalent to fight against it. she didn't understand. quoting passages of the great gatsby is nice, if you mean it, but i must re-iterate... if you actually like to read. i mean, i like all sorts of books, not just vaguely respectable ones. i like trashy awful books you get free with sunday papers, i like books written for dramatic teenage girls and horny teenage boys, but i just like to read. if i'm in the bath i will just read bottles for something to do. it's a nice way to occupy yourself, and i can't occupy myself very well, so reading is perfect for me because it's immersive and satisfying.
+ rah girls hair. rah girls are obviously an english thing, and i'm not even sure which bits of england they're indigenous to. but rah girls are terribly english girls who go to university in ugg boots, pyjama bottoms, sports gilets and backcombed chinese widow buns falling off their heads. the way they talk sounds like RAH RAH RAH RAH, explaining the name. (for further reference http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=rah) but either way, of all the things i hate about them (there are many) their hair is near the top of the list. you can tell it's long, well-conditioned, regularly cut and highlighted perfect celebrity type hair, so why do they insist on combing it backwards until it's ginormous and tangly, and then turning it into huge birds nests on their heads? i think they think it gives them an air of 'i don't give a fuck' and makes them rock chicks or whatever, but it doesn't. it's a flashing beacon to anyone who isn't a rah that they are idiots.
+ the fact that everything has a sequel. can't some films be allowed to go to the grave having only been a singular release? ghostbusters 3 for fucks sakes. what is that.
+ the human centipede. URRGH URGH URGH. ever since i heard about that, i have genuinely not felt right. i've had nightmares, it pops into my head randomly and then i tear up and have to stare at the wall, it stops me eating malt loaf. that's how associative my memory is, i can't eat malt load anymore because of that film. it's absolutely rank, and horror films don't usually gross me out, but literally this even puts me off food, and nothing puts me off food. i once ate custard while someone vomited next to me with absolutely no qualms. so well done in a way, since i haven't even seen the fucker and it's ruined my appetite.
+ how quickly hair dye fades. half my hair is still pink, and the roots are kid of pale ginger-pink, it looks weird! not that it bothers me enough to do anything about it, i just occasionally catch sight of myself in a mirror and think 'hm'.
+ the current weird weather in newcastle. it's kind of like the frequent stormy periods in my parents house; you don't know what's happening, why, or when it's going to can it. suddenly boiling hot, then cloudy, then raining? make your mind up sky, because i can't do it for you.
+ people like me who complain a lot. not in a self-loathing way, i just assume it's really boring for everyone else.
things i like vol. 1
+ zero punctuation. it's hilarious.
+ food in bed. it's delicious. and warm.
+ my jumper
+ posting cruel questions on peoples formsprings. serves them right for having formspring, what a retarded idea. i had one for like a week, thinking this'll be fun! then i realised how insanely vain it made me, and i felt like a douche and deleted it. i see the appeal admittedly, but i also have self-esteem. you can see the dilemma.
+ strawberry yoghurt in the bath. not in the bath itself, me eating strawberry yoghurt when i'm in the bath. mmmm.
+ jemina pearl. you beaut.
this has been very satisfying. strawberry yoghurt in the bath time!
Sunday 23 May 2010
i wish
people (more specifically, ladies) would stop saying that all men are dickheads because, ho ho ho, they have DICKS and HEADS, so they must be DICKHEADS. see the clever basis of the argument eh? well it's quite honestly shit, because that's like calling me a livertwat because i have a liver and... so on, so forth. i'm not big into sexism, be it against chicks or dudes. some guys are nice, some girls are nice, it doesn't make odds what gender someone is when they're nice. and likewise, if one guy or girl is an arsehole, it doesn't automatically mean that all women or all men are this that or the other. sexism is for social retards, and it boils my piss (to use a charming expression). why can't people just get along? seems daft that in this modern day and age people won't stop saying that 'all men are bastards' and making 'women in the kitchen' jokes. it's embarassing! when the aliens invade, i know that i for one will be red-faced and scuffing my shoes along the floor when they tell us off, ray-gun us and enslave us for all being such wankers.
Monday 17 May 2010
blargh
today i have woken up, and pretty much decided from the offset that it is going to be an awful day. call me crazy, but i swear, i get a twisty stomach in the morning and i know some kind of shit is going to go down. and today, i have the twisty stomach. maybe it's the tea (i'm slightly lactose intolerant) or maybe it's my gut feeling.
i phoned my boyfriend this morning, apparently to his dismay. he sounded a bit asleep and annoyed, so now i feel like a tit. i always get the feeling i annoy him or something, which probably isn't good, considering i've been with him for like nearly three years. i love the kid, love him to death, he's my best friend and we've stuck together for a long time considering our ages. but i swear sometimes he must get really annoyed at me or something. i don't blame him, i'm fairly intense. but hey, we alt types often are. i'm one of those terrible people who hates it when people don't answer their phones/ text you back quickly. so i keep texting/ ringing. i should probably stop doing that. i hate it though, it enrages me. still, what actually doesn't? that'd be a very short list. i should make some kind of pledge to be a much better person. i'd much much rather play on harry potter on the ps2 though. ok, short one.
+ be better at getting a job
+ keep going with diet/ exercise
+ probably write more
+ stop forgetting to take vitamin supplements
+ be a less annoying person
+ stop doing the changing hair colour all the time thing
i dyed my hair pink yesterday, i don't know how i feel about it yet though. it's very bright, so i'm slightly worried that i've gone for that fourteen year old nobody-understands-me look. the last time i had pink hair was two years ago, and my hair's in seriously better condition though so at least it doesn't look like candyfloss this time. (to be honest, i think it looks ace, i just honestly worry what people think about me. everyone says they don't, but really we all know that's a dirty stinking lie)
i need to shake this funky mood. how do i do it? byop or pixies on, LOUD; gym; fruit smoothie of some description (from my dad's juicer; have you been paying attention?); cycle into town; see if boyfriend wants to hang out; fix face; stroke cat; have some kind of lunch; play on playstation
obviously these are not in chronological order, but i'll probably do most of them. maybe. at the very least i'll play on the playstation.
i phoned my boyfriend this morning, apparently to his dismay. he sounded a bit asleep and annoyed, so now i feel like a tit. i always get the feeling i annoy him or something, which probably isn't good, considering i've been with him for like nearly three years. i love the kid, love him to death, he's my best friend and we've stuck together for a long time considering our ages. but i swear sometimes he must get really annoyed at me or something. i don't blame him, i'm fairly intense. but hey, we alt types often are. i'm one of those terrible people who hates it when people don't answer their phones/ text you back quickly. so i keep texting/ ringing. i should probably stop doing that. i hate it though, it enrages me. still, what actually doesn't? that'd be a very short list. i should make some kind of pledge to be a much better person. i'd much much rather play on harry potter on the ps2 though. ok, short one.
+ be better at getting a job
+ keep going with diet/ exercise
+ probably write more
+ stop forgetting to take vitamin supplements
+ be a less annoying person
+ stop doing the changing hair colour all the time thing
i dyed my hair pink yesterday, i don't know how i feel about it yet though. it's very bright, so i'm slightly worried that i've gone for that fourteen year old nobody-understands-me look. the last time i had pink hair was two years ago, and my hair's in seriously better condition though so at least it doesn't look like candyfloss this time. (to be honest, i think it looks ace, i just honestly worry what people think about me. everyone says they don't, but really we all know that's a dirty stinking lie)
i need to shake this funky mood. how do i do it? byop or pixies on, LOUD; gym; fruit smoothie of some description (from my dad's juicer; have you been paying attention?); cycle into town; see if boyfriend wants to hang out; fix face; stroke cat; have some kind of lunch; play on playstation
obviously these are not in chronological order, but i'll probably do most of them. maybe. at the very least i'll play on the playstation.
Sunday 16 May 2010
Wednesday 12 May 2010
ooh
new cocorosie
oh beautiful swimmie, how i wish i could have you. i slightly pray for a rich old man to take pity upon me and send me an anonymous gift, which ideally would be this swimmie. any nice blokes feel like it? or ladies, i'm not prejudiced.
ohhhhh how i wish i had a proper life like people i know. today i went to the jobcentre and met a nice man called stuart who gave me job applications, and then i went home. that's been it! i might cry. i long and pine for the days when my life was mostly ruled by GCSE's and my hobbies were getting very drunk on smirnoff ice and back-combing my hair. now my hair lies flat(ish), and i drink only for pleasure. well, i still drink to get hammered but i generally don't drink smirnoff ice any more. when i do occasionally drink, i drink vodka, which is apparently very calorific. when i was told this, i was both on a diet and obscenely drunk, so i pretty much got angry.
i hate online shopping, it will be the death of me.
oh beautiful swimmie, how i wish i could have you. i slightly pray for a rich old man to take pity upon me and send me an anonymous gift, which ideally would be this swimmie. any nice blokes feel like it? or ladies, i'm not prejudiced.
ohhhhh how i wish i had a proper life like people i know. today i went to the jobcentre and met a nice man called stuart who gave me job applications, and then i went home. that's been it! i might cry. i long and pine for the days when my life was mostly ruled by GCSE's and my hobbies were getting very drunk on smirnoff ice and back-combing my hair. now my hair lies flat(ish), and i drink only for pleasure. well, i still drink to get hammered but i generally don't drink smirnoff ice any more. when i do occasionally drink, i drink vodka, which is apparently very calorific. when i was told this, i was both on a diet and obscenely drunk, so i pretty much got angry.
i hate online shopping, it will be the death of me.
Monday 10 May 2010
kiuh
oh my god mickey rourke, when did you get so scary!
currently reading trashy gossip sites instead of doing anything useful. also uploading about four hundred million albums. perez hilton seriously seriously looks like jim carrey when he played the grinch. it's unnerving. and also, the two most popular names for babies in the usa are isabella and jacob. as in, the characters from twilight. isn't that rank? twilight makes me not exactly angry, because i don't care enough, but it definitely gives me slight nausea and repulsed feelings.
wow, a film is being made of jack kerouac's 'on the road'. what next, 'the catcher in the rye'? why not just completely screw up a modern classic for the sake of revenue eh? is nothing sacred? can't a book just be a book any more? films usually are shit when they're adapted from books. even harry potter, and harry potter is so awesome to read. the film has kristen stewart in it for christs sakes! she will not stop until she ruins everything! first she sullies joan jett's good name, and now this. i'm fully taking it personally. going to start sending her open tins of mackerel in the post starting tomorrow.
arhhhhh now i have rage.
currently reading trashy gossip sites instead of doing anything useful. also uploading about four hundred million albums. perez hilton seriously seriously looks like jim carrey when he played the grinch. it's unnerving. and also, the two most popular names for babies in the usa are isabella and jacob. as in, the characters from twilight. isn't that rank? twilight makes me not exactly angry, because i don't care enough, but it definitely gives me slight nausea and repulsed feelings.
wow, a film is being made of jack kerouac's 'on the road'. what next, 'the catcher in the rye'? why not just completely screw up a modern classic for the sake of revenue eh? is nothing sacred? can't a book just be a book any more? films usually are shit when they're adapted from books. even harry potter, and harry potter is so awesome to read. the film has kristen stewart in it for christs sakes! she will not stop until she ruins everything! first she sullies joan jett's good name, and now this. i'm fully taking it personally. going to start sending her open tins of mackerel in the post starting tomorrow.
arhhhhh now i have rage.
Monday 3 May 2010
hello hello
man alive, why am i awake? it's like 3 in the morning, and here i am, half-watching school of rock and half-writing this.
i have had a nice day. my friends tried to take me to the aquarium, but the queues were too big. that really sucked because i'd been reading about how there's a monkey house out the back, and i was thinking, wow, what if at 5 or something they put the monkeys in the shark tank and make them fight for food or something, so i was really excited to see if i was just dreaming. i'll probably never know. instead we drove around listening to terrible going out type tunes (the only cds in the car are compilations of things like nine inch nails, lady gaga, and old cheesy pop hits from the 90's) and i spent the day having bon jovi hair because both of my friends smoke, so they had the windows down and i always have to sit in the back, presumably because i'm the youngest and also always forget to shout shotgun, so i was all freezing with nothing but a shitty leather jacket and teeshirt on and my hair was whipping me in the face. it sounds shit, but i had a pretty good time. we went back to theirs afterwards and watched animals do the funniest things and britains got talent. animals really do, in summary, do the funniest things. i went to the pub to meet with my boyfriend and his bezzie mate and other people (who were majorly majorly wired, and not on sugar) so we just chilled from there on in, but at boyfriends bezzie mates house, because the wired people were annoying.
there is a complete summary of my day, if you were interested. sucks for you if you weren't, because you were probably reading this and being like, man i hope this gets exciting soon because this is just some account of someones day. but no. you think it sucks to read it? this is my life! i live this shit motherfuckers! haha.
here is an account of my life writing-wise. i will try and explain the complex and retarded system i have.
i have two sketchbooks. one is black vinyl covered, and one is a blue papier mache pink pig notepad. in both, i make word webs of words i like the sound of, or words i associate with a feeling, or even a colour. i also make lists of small phrases i like, or descriptives i haven't found a way to use yet. for instance, i wrote a long list the other day of good descriptives for the way someone might smell. around this, i doodled a line from a johnny cash song i like, which is 'now here comes a creature for to save my soul' because i think it's really pretty and it helps me think of things i'd like to write about. i draw inspiration from feeling, and nuance, and themes. i don't know what draws me to certain elements of writing, but the way i write is slow, very intense, and fairly unproductive. i'm not prolific. i'll go for months without being creative at all (as this blog attests) and then suddenly BLAM i'll just have this flash of imagination, usually at stupid o clock in the morning, and i'll write and write until my brain feels empty. it's a system i've used for years, but i think it needs fixing because i just don't make enough effort as it is. hopefully when i start university something in my brain will kickstart and i'll instantly be awesome, but somehow my track record with motivation leads me to think that i am lying to myself.
well done for reading all that though, if you did. if you didn't, then what are you even doing. what are you doing here if you aren't reading? what are you, a creeper? get a life creeper!
i have had a nice day. my friends tried to take me to the aquarium, but the queues were too big. that really sucked because i'd been reading about how there's a monkey house out the back, and i was thinking, wow, what if at 5 or something they put the monkeys in the shark tank and make them fight for food or something, so i was really excited to see if i was just dreaming. i'll probably never know. instead we drove around listening to terrible going out type tunes (the only cds in the car are compilations of things like nine inch nails, lady gaga, and old cheesy pop hits from the 90's) and i spent the day having bon jovi hair because both of my friends smoke, so they had the windows down and i always have to sit in the back, presumably because i'm the youngest and also always forget to shout shotgun, so i was all freezing with nothing but a shitty leather jacket and teeshirt on and my hair was whipping me in the face. it sounds shit, but i had a pretty good time. we went back to theirs afterwards and watched animals do the funniest things and britains got talent. animals really do, in summary, do the funniest things. i went to the pub to meet with my boyfriend and his bezzie mate and other people (who were majorly majorly wired, and not on sugar) so we just chilled from there on in, but at boyfriends bezzie mates house, because the wired people were annoying.
there is a complete summary of my day, if you were interested. sucks for you if you weren't, because you were probably reading this and being like, man i hope this gets exciting soon because this is just some account of someones day. but no. you think it sucks to read it? this is my life! i live this shit motherfuckers! haha.
here is an account of my life writing-wise. i will try and explain the complex and retarded system i have.
i have two sketchbooks. one is black vinyl covered, and one is a blue papier mache pink pig notepad. in both, i make word webs of words i like the sound of, or words i associate with a feeling, or even a colour. i also make lists of small phrases i like, or descriptives i haven't found a way to use yet. for instance, i wrote a long list the other day of good descriptives for the way someone might smell. around this, i doodled a line from a johnny cash song i like, which is 'now here comes a creature for to save my soul' because i think it's really pretty and it helps me think of things i'd like to write about. i draw inspiration from feeling, and nuance, and themes. i don't know what draws me to certain elements of writing, but the way i write is slow, very intense, and fairly unproductive. i'm not prolific. i'll go for months without being creative at all (as this blog attests) and then suddenly BLAM i'll just have this flash of imagination, usually at stupid o clock in the morning, and i'll write and write until my brain feels empty. it's a system i've used for years, but i think it needs fixing because i just don't make enough effort as it is. hopefully when i start university something in my brain will kickstart and i'll instantly be awesome, but somehow my track record with motivation leads me to think that i am lying to myself.
well done for reading all that though, if you did. if you didn't, then what are you even doing. what are you doing here if you aren't reading? what are you, a creeper? get a life creeper!
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