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i completely meant to have a 3. at the end of that last blog, but i was typing it for aaages and ages and then the tab decided to refresh itself all like WHAT I DIDN'T KNOW YOU WANTED TO PUBLISH THAT IT WAS SHIT ANYWAYS JEEEESH
and i got angry and posted it as it was in a rage blur, not realising that it made me look like i have no conviction to finish things and am also stupid.
so.

3. i am scared to move. the night before last, i sat up until 5:30 a.m. researching the libyan conflict and the history of libya under colonel gaddafi (qaddafi? why does everyone spell it differently?) and holy hell. even though the perpetual threat of him just deciding the bomb everything to dust has been present for years and years, the fact that i myself have only just become aware of said fact has made it infinitely more likely to happen. i wish it wasn't that way, but it is.
i am pretty damn sure g/qaddafi is evil incarnate though. linked to many bombing, publicly announcing he'll fund freedom fighting and suicide bombing, broadcasting executions of rebels, hanging out with some of his fellow contemporary evil dictators (milosevic and that red faction president) and travelling with a ukrainian sex nurse are just a few of his attractive hobbies. i wish wikipedia had a built in safe mode wherein if i try to search something like 'libya' or 'g/qaddafi' it automatically links me to 'fraggles' or 'kittens' instead. but no. so i sat up in a complete panic until six in the morning, unable to concentrate on anything else, and have since been in a state of hyperawareness. i'm usually completely politically unaware, and now i know why: THE WORLD IS TERRIFYING. have you seen the shit that is happening? tsunamis? earthquakes? nuclear fallout? bombing? it's fucking awful! how i will ever pluck up the courage to live vicariously again?
and i'd like to thank the british army for dragging us all into this mess. now we are in the running to be libya's next top bomb target. thanks a lot guys, next time do a phone in vote about whether to get involved in an overseas war effort so i can vote against it and be a massive coward. seriously, if i was the british army and i saw libya throwing bombs at itself? i'd turn the other way and whistle.

4. making a g/qaddafi sim on the sims 3 and killing it might make me feel better.

5. something else, i don't even know i'm too busy trying to be really quiet so i don't die in a war or something